Feng Shui for Break-Ups

Chocolate Therapy For Break-Ups
The end of a relationship, whether it was a short romantic fling, a long deeper connection, or even a close friendship, can feel like a divorce of some sort.

It doesn’t need to be a legal battle or an actual end of a marriage to carry the energy of divorce. Albeit, adding a legal aspect can bring much more dragged out misery and despair, all ending relationships carry grief and loss to some degree.

If you’re sensitive like me, then you not only carry your own sorry and loss, but that of your friend and/or partner’s as well. Even many years after the end of a relationship, we may still feel the loss now and again.

So, when you are in the rut of emotional despair and nothing makes you feel better, try adding a little feng shui to your space to get the positive energy moving again. Energizing your space can aid the healing process not only on a physical, but an emotional level as well.

Here are some of my favorite feng shui tips to get you started.

Fresh Bedding

If the relationship was romantic, and you lived together, getting a new bed or mattress is most ideal. This is especially helpful if you were married or in a long term relationship. If this isn’t financially possibly, a new bedding set is a great alternative; at the very least new sheets.

Think about how much time you spend in bed and as a couple.

This is a great place to remove old stale energy and invite in new energy that is yours alone.

Get rid of pictures

Is it really necessary to keep all the old photos of your ex or old friend out on display?

Holding onto pictures (even if buried in your basement) can still keep the energy of the relationship lingering. Think for a moment about the symbolism of buried in the basement.

Your basement represents the foundation of your home; YOUR foundation.

Do you need that energy lingering there?

Whether it is in your desk, in a picture frame, or in your basement, it’s time to let go. It will be challenging to attract a new relationship when you are holding onto the old one.

Get rid of gifts or items purchased togetherJewelry

This can be as simple as getting rid of some touristy junk you bought together on a trip, or as complex as the jewelry gifts, or furniture purchased together.

When I went through my divorce, I wanted all-new everything. I wanted items that fit my style and were my own. It was my dream to be able to have a gift registry, just to start over.

Again, it’s not always feasible to re-furnish your entire home, but you can attack in baby steps, adding small items here and there; a set of dishes, new art work, etc.

Jewelry is one of those hard to let go of gifts, but every time you wear something given to you from a friend or ex, you will be thinking of that person, either consciously or subconsciously. You don’t need that extra energy lingering, I promise.

So, donate to someone who would love it, or sell it on craigslist, and treat yourself to something new.

Unfriend on social media

Yes, yes, I know, it is quite the ego blow to let your Facebook friends drop down by one.

But really, what is the purpose of keeping that person on your radar?

Trust me, I completely understand the need to cyber-stalk and see what that person is “up to,” but this usually leads to feelings of resentment and more heartbreak. You may see a picture you don’t like (i.e. that person has found someone else), or it can just rehash old feelings of loss and grief, setting your healing process back even further.

The truth is, even if that person has given the illusion of moving on or he/she actually has, YOU can’t move on until you truly let go. I understand the complexity of having children and wanting to spy, but that just opens up a whole new can of worms and there are much more deeper issues to work through (maybe a future blog).

Spruce up your love and relationship corner in your home and/or bedroom

Feng Shui BedroomThis is the area that is in the far back, right corner of your home or any room as you are standing in the doorway, looking into the room. Take a peak at this area.

Is it cluttered?

Is there a bathroom?

Are there missing areas in the architecture?

Is there some amazing art, but when you look at it, you feel a little sad an lonely?

These are all major issues, some of which can be addressed quite simply, and some may that require specific feng shui cures, or remedies. For some quick fixes to the area, check out last year’s blog on Feng Shui for Love and Romance.


While these are just a few suggestions to get the energy moving, there are so many more little things you can do energetically and physically in your space.

We feel pain from all types of loss, no matter the size. Using feng shui in your space can help create shifts, ranging from lifting your vibration slightly, to moving out of depression.

Only you know how you feel, and it’s ok if it seems irrational at times. I want to remind you to be gentle on yourself, and make time your friend. Even with the slightest energy shift, you can start to heal and move on from any form of grief, large or small.

Please share your stories or comment on other ideas you have tried. I would love to hear from you!

Warmest blessings!

Feng Shui for Love and Romance

Rain with hearts illustration Valentine’s Day is an interesting holiday, in that it inspires a range of emotions and opinions.

For some, it’s a romantic and exciting day filled with love and affection.  For others, it’s a bitter reminder of being alone or unable to live up to unrealistic expectations created by Hallmark.  And sometimes the day is just about making cut-out boxes with glitter and heart-shaped confetti.

Whether you’re a believer or not, it’s difficult to avoid all the hearts, flowers, pink and chocolate popping up in the stores.  Whatever your plans may be for celebrating (or not), I thought I’d share some suggestions for applying feng shui to support your current relationship—or help attract a new one into your life.

Whether you are single, dating or married,
all of these techniques can be used to feng shui your space
for love and romance.

The love and romance area of your home is in the back-right corner (as you face it when entering the front door).  While this area of your home is relevant to relationships, it’s also important to look at your bedroom, regardless of its location in your home.  Your bedroom is your sanctuary for sleep and connecting with your partner intimately; and that is all it should be.  A desk, treadmill and even a TV can detract from the true purpose of your bedroom, causing restless sleep or straining intimacy.  Below are some ideas for sprucing up your bedroom for love and romance.  Be sure to focus on that particular area of the bedroom as well, which is the back-right corner (again, as you face it when entering the bedroom door).

  • Couple on bench in snow imageUse decor with the colors pink, red, peach or white.
  • Bring in fresh flowers (or silk ones) using these same colors.
  • Decorate with paired items.  Even if you sleep alone, think of “couples,” as with two lamps, two night stands, two pillows, two candles, etc.
  • Hang artwork that’s sensual, represents love or couples or depicts flowers, especially in pinks, reds and white.  The bedroom is not the place for heavy, intense or depressing artwork.
  • If attached to the bedroom, keep the bathroom door closed.  (If the bathroom opens up to the bedroom with no door, consider hanging a curtain for a divider.)
  • In the case of a TV that you absolutely can’t part with it, cover it when not in use (such as with a piece of hemmed fabric).
  • Remove exercise equipment and desks or anything else used for office-type work or business.
  • Create soft lighting and/or use candles.

Of course, however you feel or whatever you think about Valentine’s Day, you don’t need to be in a relationship to enjoy the day.  Perhaps you’re not desiring a romantic relationship at all.  Regardless of where you are, who you are with or where you want to be, make this week about loving and taking good care of yourself.  Do something special and nurturing just for you.

If you would like more ideas on how to feng shui your bedroom—or any other areas of your home or office—please contact me.


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